I'm Simon Sinek everything I do is devoted to one single purpose to inspire people to do what inspires them he's the two-time best-selling author whose ideology has captured the imagination of some of the most important leaders of our time including the heads of many Fortune 500 companies the US government and multiple branches of the military and the United Nations our next speaker is going to inspire you to do exactly that to change to change how you think to change how you approach life and how you approach work there's no one quite like it motivational speaker ethnographer and the author of three New York Times bestsellers simons TED talk on the concept of why is the third most watched of all time please help me in welcoming the incomparable Simon Sinek do you love your wife?, yes, right prove it like what's the metric give me the number that helps me know right because when you met her you didn't love her right now you love her right tell me the day the love happened it's an impossible question right but it's not that it doesn't exist it's that it's much easier to prove over time right so all leadership is the same thing it's about transitions so if you were to if you were to go to the gym right, like exercise right if you go to the gym and you workout and you come back and you look in the mirror you will see nothing and if you go to the gym the next day and you come back and you look in the mirror you will see nothing right so clearly there's no results can't be measured it must not be effective so we quit right or if you fundamentally believe that this is the right course of action and you stick with it like in a relationship I bought her flowers and I wished her happy birthday and she doesn't love me clearly I'll give up you know that's not what happens if you if you believe there's something there you commit yourself to act an act of service you commit yourself to the regime the exercise you can't screw it up you can eat chocolate cake one day you can skip a skip a day or two you know you it allows for that but if you stick with it consistently I'm not exactly sure what day but I know you'll start getting into shape I know and the same with the relationship it's not about the events it's not about intensity it's about consistency right you go to the dentist twice a year your teeth will fall out you have to brush your teeth every day for two minutes what is brushing your teeth twice a day for two minutes do nothing unless you do it every day twice a day for two minutes right it's the consistency going to the gym for nine hours does not get you into shape working out every day for 20 minutes gets you into shape so the problem is we treat leadership with intensity we have a two-day off-site we invite a bunch of speakers we give everybody certificate you're a leader right those things are like going to the dentist they're very important their good for reminding us or getting us back on track learning new lessons but it's the daily practice of all the monotonous little boring things like brushing your teeth that matter the most she didn't fall in love with you because you remembered her birthday and bought her flowers and Valentine's Day she fell in love with you because when you woke up in the morning you said good morning to her before you checked your phone she fell in love with you because when you went to the fridge to get yourself a drink you got her one without even asking she fell in love with you because when you had an amazing day at work and she came home and she had a terrible day at work you didn't say yeah yeah yeah but let me tell you about my day you sat and listened to her awful day and you didn't say a thing about your amazing day this is why she fell in love with you I can't tell you exactly what day and it was no particular thing you did it was the accumulation of all of those little things that she woke up one days and it's as if she pressed a button she goes I love him right leadership is exactly the same there's no event there's no thing I can tell you you have to do that your people will trust you it just doesn't work that way it's an accumulation of lots and lots of little things that anyone by themselves is innocuous and useless literally pointless by themselves people will look at little things that are good leadership practice and say that won't work and you're absolutely right but if you do it consistently and you do it in combination with lots of other little things like saying good morning to someone that looking them in the eye My friend George was a three-star general in the Marine Corps he says his test for leadership and I love this he goes his test really a good leaders if you ask somebody how their day is going you actually care about the answer and the number of times were walking to a meeting we're rushing we go how are you not good I gotta get to you later Im late for a meeting if you asked the question you were standing there and you're listening to the answer it's those little innocuous things that you do over and over and over and over that people will say I love my job not I like my job I like my job means yeah the challenge is great they pay me well I like the people I love my job means I don't want to work anywhere else I don't care how much somebody else was willing to pay me I'm devoted to the people here and I care desperately about the people here as if they were my family in business we have colleagues and co-workers in the military they have brothers and sisters that's how they think of each other right if you really have a strong corporate culture the people will think of each other like brothers and sisters, it's like a family right no brothers and sisters deep love fight but the love doesn't go away right bicker the love doesn't go away and I'll fight with my sister but if you threaten my sister you're gonna have to deal with me right right we'll fight internally we'll bicker with each other but nobody's gonna hurt each other and if anything from the outside shows up you're looking at a unified front brothers and sisters now how do you create brothers and sisters out of strangers common beliefs common values you know parents in other words executives who care about their children's success who care to raise their children teach them skills discipline them when necessary help them build their self-confidence so that they could go on and achieve something more than you could have ever imagined achieving for yourself that's leadership an absolute love and devotion for the people who've committed their lives to this enterprise that's such a brilliant reframe it's so simple and so beautiful and unbelievably hard work it is and it isn't Here's why it is you said it it's hard to measure right Its hard to show hard to measure in the short term it's very easy to measure in the long term over the long term the traditional metrics will go up all your revenues profits market share the traditional metrics will go up and more importantly they'll go up more stably right you will be able to weather hard times better because the people will come together they won't abandon ship right in the over the long term the traditional metrics are just fine but also over the long term your churn will go down right you won't be going through employees as much right over the long term you'll find that loyalty is much higher that people will turn down better paying jobs right over the long term all the traditional metrics are just fine and then some it's only the short-term that it's hard to measure I was staying at the Four Seasons in Las Vegas which is a wonderful hotel and the service there is really great the reason it's such a great hotel is because of the people who work there and I had an experience with a young man by the name of Noah and Noah's a barista in the coffee shop that they have just there in the lobby and I was buying a cup of coffee and Noah was charming and funny and engaging and I think I gave a hundred percent tip I think my five dollar coffee I think I gave a five dollar tip I mean this guy was great I love talking to him he was a joy and I asked him do you like your job he said to me I love my job without skipping a beat and I asked what is it that four seasons is doing that you love your job so much he says with again without skipping a beat he says throughout the day managers will walk past and ask how I'm doing if there's anything that I need he said not just my manager any manager Wow he says I feel supported here he says quote I can be myself right Aww Its Magic and then he says to me I also work at Caesar's Palace and there the managers go around to make sure that we're doing everything right and catch us if we do something wrong he says when I go to work at Caesar's Palace I keep my head just under the radar because I don't want to get in trouble he said I just want to get through the day and make a paycheck all right same person right the experience that I have it the four seasons will be diametrically opposite to the experience that I have at Caesar's Palace not because of Noah but because of Noah's leadership right and the joke is if I were to go talk to the managers over Caesars Palace and say you know it's you they'll say but you don't understand we cannot get good work out of our people look look no matter how hard we try and how hard we push them they just don't so we either have to replace them a push them harder no we respond to the environments we're in get the environment right you get the right behavior get the environment wrong you get the wrong behavior if that is what is happening it is because of leadership not because of the people yeah there was a really famous cartoon back in the 80s the beatings will continue until the morale improves yeah that was hilarious because it's so terrifyingly accurate and and astonishingly look I'm embarrassed that I have a career you know I talk about things like trust and cooperation why is there demand for my work you know but the fact that there is I'll take it as an opportunity but what's really sort of abominable is that this is not a new idea like there are books galore and speeches galore and articles galore about what leadership is you know we all kind of say the same thing from a different angle you can pick your flavor whichever message resonates most with you and yet people don't do it what's the hang-up and so I get this question a lot which is what do you know what are the most important characteristics about being a leader vision charisma you know I know some spectacular leaders who don't have big Steve Jobs visions they're just not visionary you know and I know some spectacular leaders who really don't have a lot of charisma they kind of just shuffle around and you're like that's the guy yeah that's the guy right and they're spectacular, people will give blood sweat and tears for these people the one thing I am comfortable saying that all effective leaders must have is courage because it is hard it is hard to stand up against outside pressure it is hard to stand up to an external constituency who's pushing you to do something for their short-term gain to do the right thing for your people it is hard it is a thankless it is lonely it's sometimes sometimes you get fired sometimes you get in trouble sometimes you'll lose your job and the next guy will get all the credit it's all true and the courage to do the right thing in the face of overwhelming pressure only the best leaders have that courage only the best leaders and here's the folly courage is not some deep internal fortitude you don't dig down deep and find the courage right it just doesn't exist courage is external our courage comes from the support we feel from others in other words when you feel that someone has your back when you know that the day that you admit you can't do it someone will be there and say I got you you can do this that's what gives you the courage to do the difficult thing it's not going off to an ashram by yourself somewhere for four weeks and coming back it's not what happens it's the relationships that we foster it's the people around us who love us and care about us and believe in us and when we have those relationships we will find the courage to do the right thing and when you act with courage that in turn will inspire those in your organization to also act with courage in other words it's still an external thing that's what inspiration is right I'm inspired to follow your example but those relationships that we foster over the course of a lifetime will not only make us into the leaders we need to be in and hope we can be but they'll often save your life they'll save you from depression they'll save you from giving up they'll save you from any matter of you know negative feelings about your own capabilities your own future when someone just says I love you and I will follow you no matter what So I want to talk about that for a second why do you think that something so innate so deeply ingrained in us as love is so like just yesterday I can't believe this is true this is actually true I'm making this up just yesterday so it means something to you guys I looked Ron pennant in his eyes and I said I love you and I said it like a hundred percent, he's my business partner, I said it a hundred percent sincerely it was just one of those moments where you wanna connect and remember but that's so weird like I don't do that often and it's so interesting that it becomes out of context is it the best way to say it because like at home with my wife it's so easy and I'd love to embody and I love to feel it and makes me feel awesome but then I come into the office and there's something about the context that makes it weird yes two perspectives one is this is what vulnerability is right being vulnerable doesn't mean crying being vulnerable means willing to admit you made a mistake being vulnerable is the willingness to say I need help being vulnerable is the willingness to express the feelings you have towards someone without fear of what other people may think of you by making that expression and most people especially if they don't have a trusting environment or a strong corporate culture most people don't want to feel vulnerable it's dangerous to feel vulnerable if you admit you made a mistake but you don't know what you're doing you've been promoted into a job that you have no clue or no business being in that job lying hiding and faking is a much better option right but for the fact that it's more stressful and ultimately the results will falter right it's counterintuitive but that's what a strong environment means it means I can be vulnerable so the fact that you can say that out loud means that there's a loving trusting culture here that is okay with you being vulnerable nobody's thinking oh my god this company's going downhill this guy's nuts he's you know he's blubbering all over the place you know that's not what people are think I mean some people are probably thinking but generally that's not what people are thinking if anything people are going cool and that then inspires them to feel that they can also express vulnerability like admitted mistake like say they screwed up like say they need help but say you know they want to offer help to someone and not fear that either so that's that's one perspective the other the other reason why stuff that I talk about or that you're talking about now is so often ignored is just because it's hard to measure you know how do you measure leadership, How do you measure? How do you measure trust you know they lack good metrics it's very easy to measure revenues and profits and market share so let's focus on those things because I can I can like pull a lever here and see what happens over there but in terms of like trust ill pull a lever and I won't see anything for six months so it's not that I don't know that it exists everybody talks about the importance of culture yet nobody seems to be focused on building it I've never met a CEO in my life who doesn't think people are important and yet every day they're making decisions that prioritize a number over a person that literally don't care about people they make decisions that literally brush people aside, because it's hard to measure in an ultra speedy you know algorithmic world that we live in what gets measured gets done
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